The classical definition of Defiance: (1) The act or an example of defying; bold resistance to an opposing force or authority, (2) Intentionally contemptuous behavior or attitude; readiness to contend or resist, (3) Suspicion; mistrust.

To me, Defiance looks like a kid that refuses to eat her green beans. Or, refusing to empty the dishwasher because you’ve done it the last 4 times, and it’s time for someone else to pick up that ‘chore’. It’s like resisting the urge to jump in the car to obtain an ice cream cone because you saw an advertisement.

What does Defiance feel like? Where do you feel it in your body? To me, it feels like determined resistance to do something you know you ‘should’ do. Or in opposition, it is grabbing an orange to eat, instead of caving to the scrumptious suggestion to grab some ice cream. It creates a dust storm of negativity. It feels like a wall I’m not willing to move or reshape.

Feeling Defiance (defiant) functions to create a stand or a perspective that I’m not willing to budge away from. Sure, it could gently be creating a healthy boundary, but when I experience it, it feels more like a child refusing to do something. It often functions as a boundary for me, without consideration for anyone else but myself. Being aware of its presence could provide me with an opportunity to shift stubbornness into a fresh cool drink of flexibility.

I offer you this invitation to explore defiance today. What does defiance look like to you? How does it feel to you? Once you identify it, see if you can understand its function. Upon that grasp then explore how you can reshape that into something that functions for you.

Our feelings can be fluid vessels of goodness…

Continue Reading