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    • Invisible Wounds an Inside Story

      “My personal memoir is finally here for you to read. I have held nothing back in sharing the most horrific experience imaginable through becoming the the whole person I am today. Get your copy and be prepared for the ride of your life.” Alexis Faere

      Alexis Faere Invisible Wounds
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      Alexis Faere’s book gives an inside look into the author’s personal journey, recounting a harrowing kidnap and rape experience and the subsequent evolution from victim to survivor. Her words explore the process of integrating this traumatic event into her identity. When asked about the intended impact of the story, Alexis expresses a desire to reach out to victims of sexual abuse, individuals coping with various life traumas, and even convicted sex offenders engaged in treatment programs.

      The significance of this book to Alexis lies in the aspiration to assist others in their trauma recovery. Drawing from personal experience, Alexis emphasizes the need for understanding and validation during the recovery process. Having faced challenges in articulating the profound turmoil within, she hopes that sharing this experience through words will empower others to find a language for integrating their own traumatic experiences.

      Purchase Invisible Wounds: An Inside Story

      As an awkward music nerd teenager, Alexis Faere took a leap of faith to go on a blind date. In an innocent instant, at knifepoint, the landscape of her life would be forever changed. How do you resume life after clawing your way through sheer terror? Invisible Wounds is not just a recount of Alexis’ harrowing kidnap and rape experience, but a hopeful testament to our spirit and will as humans to heal and thrive. In this book, Alexis offers a lifeline, affirming that recovery is possible, and beauty exists beyond survival. If you’re a victim of sexual abuse or other life trauma, this book will leave you understanding that every scar tells a story of resilience and hope.


      “For those of you who have endured abuse of any type, you are about to be reminded of the resilience of the human spirit. You, too, are resilient in the same way.” —Pete Henschel, Ph.D.


      “This is a powerful story that needs to be available to those who need encouragement through trauma, and available to those of us who don’t have a clue. It is gut-wrenching, to say the least. It has made me think about things I’ve never considered before.” —Patrice Searsy


      “This book is a story of one person’s journey. It is a story of the unthinkable and the unbearable, and eventually the improbable and unbelievable. It is quite a story and worth your read.“
      —E. Britton Wood, Jr., Ph.D., Family Consultant and Therapist Retired

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    • Emotional Maturity

      Emotional Maturity

      Emotional maturity – what does that mean? Our world is full of both goodness and social unrest. My observations of current world issues lead me to believe there is value in conscious emotional awareness – emotional maturity.

      Consider events such as politics, corporate well-being, crimes against others, grief, anger, school shootings, and so on. Conscious or unconscious emotional responses have everything to do with the maturity of our leaders, children, families, and individuals.

      Emotional Maturity Feelings

      Emotional maturity means understanding how we experience and respond to feelings. For a simple example, imagine someone speaking harshly toward you. What is the first emotion you feel? Shock, anger, misunderstood, defensive, or something similar. When you feel the emotion, is it conscious or unconscious? For a unique example, remember someone who speaks lovingly to you. How is your immediate emotional feeling different from the first example? Caring, open, understanding, and warm. Again, when you feel the emotion, is it conscious or unconscious?

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    • Trust Talk

      Trust Talk

      Let’s talk about relationship dynamics when it’s hard to trust. This applies to friends and family for sure, but I’m drawing this point more narrowly to spouse or partner relationships.

      You find your ‘one.’ You tie the knot. In the beginning, it feels like you have every reason to trust that you’re going to be respected. You trust the other person to hold you dear in your most vulnerable moments. Then something happens and that ‘all-in’ trust comes into question. Maybe your definition of what it means to trust someone differs from the other person’s idea of trust. Whatever the cause and wherever you are in your trust-o-meter, trust between you and your ‘one true love’ changes and you question your choices.

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    • Volatile

      Volatile

      We’ve all seen people in a volatile state. Scary, I know! Truth is, we all feel it but sometimes don’t recognize it until after the fact. It appears when we experience rapid or unexpected change (like when the Japanese stock market dropped). Or, sometimes it comes on suddenly in an explosive reaction to something (case and point when you just lose it). I seem to experience it most profoundly as an explosive reaction. I rarely realize it until I see someone else’s shocked face or there’s an air of ‘give her some space’ in the immediate area.

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    • Weak

      Weak

      There’s physical weakness and there’s feeling emotionally weak. You guessed it, I’m talking about emotionally feeling weak. I’m in that club of people who feel like I need to be strong all the time. However, I learning to embrace my perceived weaknesses in a way that emphasizes my strengths. Oh boy. Here we go!

      First, let me say that feeling weak from time to time doesn’t define you as a weak person. (Note to self.) Perhaps it is an invitation to deepen a relationship by reaching out for a hand to hold, or a shoulder to cry on. Or maybe it’s an opportunity for me to let the walls fall away and be present in the moment. As corny as it sounds, feeling weak can also be a strength, especially when we can see it, name it, and feel it. When I see it, it helps me figure out the best way to deal with it. Maybe that means taking a nap, going for a walk, or simply holding myself tenderly for a moment.

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    • Xenophobic

      Xenophobic

      What in the world is xenophobic? I know. An emotion word that starts with x. There are so few of them, but this one is real, too. Yes, I’m aware, I’m still exploring negative emotions, but this one is worth understanding a little better. First, let’s start with a definition of what that means.

      Merriam-Webster defines xenophobia as having fear and hatred towards strangers, foreigners, or anything unfamiliar. This certainly has a context as it applies to prejudice and racism. (I found a good article about that here.) I believe, though, that it also has appropriate application as it pertains to our fear of different emotions.

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    • Planet SARK

      Unchained Writer

    • Appreciation Magic

      Appreciation Magic

      It’s time to swim in appreciation magic! Go ahead. Look around. Appreciation is there somewhere. Maybe it’s in that greeting card you set aside to read when you felt swept away by the life happening around you. Oh, here’s one! Imagine scrolling through your social feeds and finding the perfect words of encouragement. Thank you, world, for seeing me and hearing me. (Appreciation magic.)

      We all want to feel appreciated. It’s a magic salve that lubricates our hearts and reminds us we’re in this world thing together. Genuinely, folks, I appreciate you! Many times, your ideas and words are just the right magic to turn the lights on in my heart. So thanks for putting your ideas into words. Just sayin’!

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    • Yobbish

      Yobbish

      In the scope of emotions, what on earth does yobbish mean? The classic definition states it this way: rude, noisy, and sometimes aggressive or violent. Doesn’t sound so much like a cheerful topic, but one worthy of more understanding.

      I don’t go around looking for this emotion, but it surfaces sometimes when I least expect it. Knowing what it means, it’s easier to see in others than in myself. When I feel yobbish, the energy feels like I’m screaming from the inside out. The root of feeling rude, noisy, or even aggressive leads me to act without thought or courtesy of what’s going on around me. It can be very consuming and blinding. That’s where it becomes destructive.

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    • Zombie

      Zombie

      What does it mean to feel like a zombie and what does that have to do with negative emotions? Starting with Z and working my way to A, I’m going to be exploring some negative emotions for a bit. I promise it won’t last forever, but I’m going to do this for myself just to get better acquainted with the different colors of emotions that I feel. Perhaps my exploration will open some ideas and doors for you as well. The next batch, after the negative emotions, will be peaceful emotions. Woo hoo! (Something to look forward to, for sure!)

      Okay, back to the idea of feeling zombie-esque. Sometimes when I take part in activities that I feel like I have to do, the concept of enjoying my life eludes me. That triggers my zombie feelings. Why is it so dad gum easy to fall into that trap and forget about the joy that drove you to do things in the first place? I found an interesting article about that from The Guardian.

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    • The Sweet Spot

      The Sweet Spot

      Watch out for the sweet spot! Maybe yours is finding the perfect place on the head of a golf club to smack that little white ball into the playing field. Or maybe you’re having a conversation and the perfect timing happens for you to say something. Oh, then there’s a spot in nature that’s just right for hanging a hammock. (If you’re unaware, I live for hammock moments!) The sweet spot!

      What is it about finding the right spot on a calendar? It works for you; it works for them, and everyone seems to be happy. Okay. Dinner is at 6:30 on Thursday. Perfect.

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    • Coming Out of the Woodwork

      Coming Out of the Woodwork

      Now that my memoir, Invisible Wounds: An Inside Story, is published, amazing connections are coming out of the woodwork. It’s scary to write a story about the most horrific thing that happened to me. Some people I know are aware of this story, and others are not. I didn’t know how my friends and family would respond to me after sharing so vulnerably about this trauma.

      I often talk about how vulnerability is a vehicle for making deeper connections with people. People are writing and sharing their experiences with me after reading this book. That is so encouraging! The subject of kidnap and rape is a fearful topic for some. Everyone is going to react to such a story differently. It’s a vile topic and one that many people are afraid to talk about. I found, in my experience, that some people responded more favorably than others. That said, I stand firm in realizing this topic is something that needs airtime.

      Here’s the rub: it’s all good. I admire those who stay silent, find a few disagreements, and open their hearts to share, so we can celebrate our lives. It’s all real, and it’s all good. What? Even the disagreements are good? Yes, those. Each person has a right to feel what they are going to feel. It’s all part of the emotional colors that make up the canvases of our lives. I’m secure enough about who I am that disagreements can be present without affecting my big amazing.

      Thank you! For those who’ve read this book, thank you for taking the time to read this story. Thank you for finding your own words, experiences, and especially your will to grow and thrive. The amazing power of our collective human spirits is alive and well. Let’s bravely share our stories and find deeper connections with one another. I’m glad you are here.

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    • Story People

      Marcy Pusey

    • Accepted

      Accepted

      Accepted is not only an emotion about feeling included within a group of people, but it is also about feeling resolute about yourself and who you are—warts and all. As I get familiar with my emotions, I’m exploring the latter right now. When I accept myself, I find it easier to absorb feeling accepted by a group outside of myself.

      Picture a warmly received gift, and that’s what feeling accepted looks like to me. I imagine how the earth receives anything that falls upon it. This might be a leaf or a twig that has loosened from a tree branch, or it might be a gum wrapper that gently escaped someone’s grasp. Gravity aside, the earth accepts whatever falls upon it. Some of what falls to the earth is more nourishing than others. The same is true for humans. Our bodies take whatever we give them, and some things are more useful than others.

      I feel acceptance in my whole body; my heart warms and my soul lightens. Where do you feel accepted in your body? This is an idea I’ve not explored much until now. Truth be told, I’m finding it hard to wrap words around it to describe it. It’s interesting to play with the idea and get better acquainted with it. My challenge with this exercise reveals an uncertainty that feels uncomfortable. Hmmm.

      Acceptance is an emotion that facilitates personal grace. When I think about confident people, I sense they accept their complete selves. It is hard sometimes to accept our personal truths. For example, when I carry more weight than I’d like, I struggle with self-acceptance. The cold ugly truth! I’m reaping that which I’ve sown and loving this extra part of me proves challenging. Loving my warts is hard sometimes, but I choose to give it a whirl. I have much to learn!

      This is a fascinating emotion. (She breathes in acceptance and lets go of judgment.) I accept you, who you are, and all the ways being you which facilitate your uniqueness.

      In the sea of all her emotions, she finds acceptance…

      Explore more feelings in the Stayin’ in Touch – Positive Emotions book. You can play with them when or wherever you like.

      Image by NoName 13 from Pixabay

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