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What makes your soul dance? Have you ever watched a movie that reached into the depths of your soul to a point of tears, and you let the tears flow without reservation? When our souls move and we feel; these are wonderfully deep and authentic emotions. What is it about connecting with our soul so deeply that it makes us spontaneously feel?
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Do you feel shame?
Emotions can be teachers for us to stay true to who we are or who we want to be. Think for a moment about the last time you felt shame. Where does that feeling come from? Did you think or believe that if you hid, your shame would disappear and no one would notice? Maybe you felt like you were flawed.
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Do you feel troubled?
Have you ever felt restless for seemingly no reason at all? This could be a sign that you feel more troubled about something than you realize. Sneaky little feeling, troubled. This little feeling (or not so small feeling) can be full of little gifts for us if we can give ourselves a moment to explore more about it.
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Mood swings and trauma recovery are a real thing. Sometimes the world seems as right as rain. Then there are those times when our internal world struggles to make a smile come out. Kind, supportive thoughts seem elusive. This is a natural momentum. Emotions feel like they are swinging up and down. Have you ever experienced that?
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I’m feeling uncertain about this (or that). Is that a good thing or a bad thing? Whether we perceive it as positive or negative, uncertainty could be a generous gift. I’m exploring negative emotions right now, so I’m diving into this one from that perspective.
We are each unique in our approach to life and the subtle (or not-so-subtle) nuances of emotions that color our lives. You might feel comfortable with a higher volume of uncertainty in your life than others. I don’t mind some uncertainty, especially when trying out new things and seeing how they influence everything else. Raise the stakes though, and the uncertainty becomes overwhelming, with a generous helping of fear on the side. Case and point: writing a memoir and publishing it. (Eeegadz, did I just do that?) That was scary with a capital S. There’s some uncertainty!
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We’ve all seen people in a volatile state. Scary, I know! Truth is, we all feel it but sometimes don’t recognize it until after the fact. It appears when we experience rapid or unexpected change (like when the Japanese stock market dropped). Or, sometimes it comes on suddenly in an explosive reaction to something (case and point when you just lose it). I seem to experience it most profoundly as an explosive reaction. I rarely realize it until I see someone else’s shocked face or there’s an air of ‘give her some space’ in the immediate area.
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There’s physical weakness and there’s feeling emotionally weak. You guessed it, I’m talking about emotionally feeling weak. I’m in that club of people who feel like I need to be strong all the time. However, I learning to embrace my perceived weaknesses in a way that emphasizes my strengths. Oh boy. Here we go!
First, let me say that feeling weak from time to time doesn’t define you as a weak person. (Note to self.) Perhaps it is an invitation to deepen a relationship by reaching out for a hand to hold, or a shoulder to cry on. Or maybe it’s an opportunity for me to let the walls fall away and be present in the moment. As corny as it sounds, feeling weak can also be a strength, especially when we can see it, name it, and feel it. When I see it, it helps me figure out the best way to deal with it. Maybe that means taking a nap, going for a walk, or simply holding myself tenderly for a moment.
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What in the world is xenophobic? I know. An emotion word that starts with x. There are so few of them, but this one is real, too. Yes, I’m aware, I’m still exploring negative emotions, but this one is worth understanding a little better. First, let’s start with a definition of what that means.
Merriam-Webster defines xenophobia as having fear and hatred towards strangers, foreigners, or anything unfamiliar. This certainly has a context as it applies to prejudice and racism. (I found a good article about that here.) I believe, though, that it also has appropriate application as it pertains to our fear of different emotions.
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In the scope of emotions, what on earth does yobbish mean? The classic definition states it this way: rude, noisy, and sometimes aggressive or violent. Doesn’t sound so much like a cheerful topic, but one worthy of more understanding.
I don’t go around looking for this emotion, but it surfaces sometimes when I least expect it. Knowing what it means, it’s easier to see in others than in myself. When I feel yobbish, the energy feels like I’m screaming from the inside out. The root of feeling rude, noisy, or even aggressive leads me to act without thought or courtesy of what’s going on around me. It can be very consuming and blinding. That’s where it becomes destructive.
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What does it mean to feel like a zombie and what does that have to do with negative emotions? Starting with Z and working my way to A, I’m going to be exploring some negative emotions for a bit. I promise it won’t last forever, but I’m going to do this for myself just to get better acquainted with the different colors of emotions that I feel. Perhaps my exploration will open some ideas and doors for you as well. The next batch, after the negative emotions, will be peaceful emotions. Woo hoo! (Something to look forward to, for sure!)
Okay, back to the idea of feeling zombie-esque. Sometimes when I take part in activities that I feel like I have to do, the concept of enjoying my life eludes me. That triggers my zombie feelings. Why is it so dad gum easy to fall into that trap and forget about the joy that drove you to do things in the first place? I found an interesting article about that from The Guardian.
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Accepted is not only an emotion about feeling included within a group of people, but it is also about feeling resolute about yourself and who you are—warts and all. As I get familiar with my emotions, I’m exploring the latter right now. When I accept myself, I find it easier to absorb feeling accepted by a group outside of myself.
Picture a warmly received gift, and that’s what feeling accepted looks like to me. I imagine how the earth receives anything that falls upon it. This might be a leaf or a twig that has loosened from a tree branch, or it might be a gum wrapper that gently escaped someone’s grasp. Gravity aside, the earth accepts whatever falls upon it. Some of what falls to the earth is more nourishing than others. The same is true for humans. Our bodies take whatever we give them, and some things are more useful than others.
I feel acceptance in my whole body; my heart warms and my soul lightens. Where do you feel accepted in your body? This is an idea I’ve not explored much until now. Truth be told, I’m finding it hard to wrap words around it to describe it. It’s interesting to play with the idea and get better acquainted with it. My challenge with this exercise reveals an uncertainty that feels uncomfortable. Hmmm.
Acceptance is an emotion that facilitates personal grace. When I think about confident people, I sense they accept their complete selves. It is hard sometimes to accept our personal truths. For example, when I carry more weight than I’d like, I struggle with self-acceptance. The cold ugly truth! I’m reaping that which I’ve sown and loving this extra part of me proves challenging. Loving my warts is hard sometimes, but I choose to give it a whirl. I have much to learn!
This is a fascinating emotion. (She breathes in acceptance and lets go of judgment.) I accept you, who you are, and all the ways being you which facilitate your uniqueness.
In the sea of all her emotions, she finds acceptance…
Explore more feelings in the Stayin’ in Touch – Positive Emotions book. You can play with them when or wherever you like.
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Life Gifts
- Sending you bright colored paint for your life canvas.
- I send you calm, to remember love and caring.
- I send you a warm spot of cheer and buckets of love for you to use as you wish.
- I send you succulent sweet chocolate kisses and delightfully warm hugs.
- I send you over-flowing cups of love to restore your heart and soul.
- I send you delicious caring and big love.
- I send you gentle care and comfort, and I hold your heart with love in mine.
- Sending you nourishing rest and mindful body care.
- I send you clocks that indicate there is plenty of time.
- I send you bright flowers to see, smell, enjoy, and nurture.
- Sending you tasty inspiration.
- I send you giggles and chortles to accent all the moments of your day.
- Sending you flashlights for exploring your dark places.
- I send you appreciation for caring to make healthy choices for yourself.
- Sending you magical lenses to sharpen your focus.
- Sending you oodles of energy noodles.
- I send you relaxing moments filled with love and caring.
- Sending you peace and beauty, like the glassy stillness of a lake before the breeze’s caress stirs things up.
- I send you warm, comfortable rest.
- Sending you a magical cool sheet to snuggle in and feel safe.
- I send you soothing healing.
- I send you light to illuminate the places inside you that seem dark.
- I send you energetic bursts of joy.
- I send you calm as you step back into work from being off for a few weeks.
- Sending you nourishing soup for your soul.
- I send you courage and honor.
- I send you the lightest hint of lilac and a handful of petals.
- I send you glorious freedom to move your body and experience joy.
- I send you large bundles of gratitude for being who you are, and for being connected with me.
- I send you honor and respect as you navigate this wave in your life.
- I send you tender, loving arms to hold you in care and love.
- I send you inspiration to put thoughts on paper.
- I send you soothing cups of hot tea, your favorite music to listen to and time for you to relax and enjoy.
- I send you delicious moments filled with rare and marvelous accents that grow your heart.
- I send you pregnant pauses to remember how much you are loved and cared for.
- I send you contagious child-like giggles and unstoppable smiles.
- I send you chortles, giggles and warm hugs.
- Sending you joy and glee in celebration of your accomplishment.
- Sending you buckets of patience to spill in all the places that need some—be sure to douse yourself with some.
- I send you showers of grace and peace.
- I send you a warm hand to hold as you experience the array of feelings that go along with the death of your loved one.
- Sending you giant pails of peace to spill or splash in.
- I send you showers of strength as you walk your journey.
- Sending you joy.
- Sending you willing, loving hearts and hands to help you.
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